Why do people cheapen what I tell them?
Why is it that when I finally open up, someone decides to take advantage of it?

I sat with my feet in the beach sand, hot air filling my lungs at midnight, staring up at the stars.
The whole trip I felt like I couldnt talk to anyone,
travis walked up and sat next to me, and I spoke: hot fluid and burning words out of my mouth. Disdain, fear, sadness-god, so much sadness- and everything I saw, and wanted, my life, where I am going, how much I see, how old I feel.

and he was suprised, and intrigued. I kept talking, by the end of the conversation- he was so intrigued he said that he was going to marry me. He asked me If he could kiss me- I said no.

and i felt cheapened, why does it always have to be something more?
where is the face value?

Why do I have to be intriguing or lovely because I feel deeply?
Why can't someone just want to be friends and not try to claim me?

Why is that when I finally open up, someone see's the special and wants to shit on it by making me solely and only theirs?

Why cant it just be one deep meaningful conversation?

I am tired of being cheapened, and feeling dirty after I talk. I am tired of someone looking at me like im a shard of hope in their life because of whats inside me, I am tired of being gold among the dirt,I am tired of being the protector when I want someone to protect me. I am tired of being taken advantage of, I am tired of how i feel i have no one to talk to, and everytime I do it turns into something else.


I want to be listened too,
I want simplicity,
I want face value,
I want calm,
I want someone to take me for me

and to not cheapen it in the end.