Maybe you are just another form of self sabatoge for me,
each moment i hold on to you i dig more inches in my grave,

HOW MUCH IS TOO MUCH!????

i am so lost, and no one is taking care of me, and somehow i am managing to take care of everyone else.

and i do these things i am hiding in

because i dont want to face where im at, i dont want to look at you anymore, i dont want to look at myself, i dont want to keep writhing in this pain of stunted growth.


where is my redemption, my mercy?


I AM ALWAYS THE FUCKING PROBLEM


i am so fucking lost,
ive been lost for 2 months,


and yet no one has seen




my heart bleeds more and more each day and
no one can hear me screaming except for me